Never Enough Read online

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright Page

  Acknowledgements

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  AUTHOR’S NOTE

  Praise for

  INSIDE OUT

  “Inside Out is tender, romantic and unapologetically sexy. Lauren Dane writes with an emotional depth and authenticity that always leaves me breathless.”

  —Lara Adrian, New York Times bestselling author

  “A beautiful masterpiece. Every word was a gift.”

  —The Romance Reviews

  “Inside Out made my heart melt—it gives you this wonderful warm feeling deep inside. It’s full of family and friends, love and compassion. An emotional read through and through. For me, her Brown Siblings novels are forever seated on my keeper shelf, and I know I will reread their stories again and again. A highly recommended read—I adore this book with all my heart!”

  —Book Lovers Inc.

  “Lauren Dane is the master of having the reader become emotionally invested in her characters and her stories.”

  —Good Books, Good Coffee, Good Life

  LAID BARE

  “It’s impossible not to love this story. The sex is sizzling, the emotions are raw. Lauren Dane has done it again. Laid Bare, quite simply, rocks!”

  —Megan Hart, national bestselling author of Precious and Fragile Things

  “I was blown away by Dane’s emotionally charged, deeply erotic tale of second chances and redemption. I can’t say it enough: I loved this book!”

  —Sylvia Day, author of Pride and Pleasure

  “A tender love story that wrung my heart with its sweetness. Don’t miss this book.”

  —Ann Aguirre, national bestselling author of Shady Lady

  “Laid Bare lives up to its title . . . Dane provides a heated yet entreating second chance at love due to the tender caring in and out of the bed of each of the prime players.”

  —The Best Reviews

  “In a word, this book is amazing. All three characters are magnetic and thoroughly realistic. They’re expertly woven into a roller-coaster story that will have you crying one moment, aroused the next and laughing with glee at each triumphant step along the way . . . This is Dane’s best story yet!”

  —Romantic Times

  UNDERCOVER

  “Lauren Dane deftly weaves action, intrigue and emotion with spicy, delicious eroticism . . . a toe-curling erotic romance sure to keep you reading late into the night.”

  —Anya Bast, New York Times bestselling author of Jaded

  “Sexy, pulse-pounding adventure . . . that’ll leave you weak in the knees. Dane delivers!”

  —Jaci Burton, national bestselling author of Changing the Game

  “Exciting, emotional and arousing.”

  —Sasha White, author of Most Wanted

  “Fast-paced action, steamy romance.”

  —Megan Hart

  “Scintillating! . . . a roller coaster of emotion, intrigue and sensual delights . . . I was hooked from the first sentence.”

  —Vivi Anna, author of The Vampire’s Kiss

  “Be in line at your favorite bookstore the day it comes out. In other words, it is a Recommended Read . . . one I plan on reading over and over again.”

  —Joyfully Reviewed

  “A hot, sexy and action-packed piece of writing that will keep you glued to every page wondering what will happen next. A fabulous read!”

  —Fresh Fiction

  “Wow! This book rocks! Lauren Dane pulls out all the stops with this soul-searing, awe-inspiring read. Definitely a must read and deserving of a special spot on the keeper shelf.”

  —Romance Junkies

  More praise for Lauren Dane and her novels

  “Drool worthy.”

  —Romance Junkies

  “This story has it all! There is action, drama, interesting characters, an electrifying story line and hot, passionate sex . . . a truly beautiful and sensual story . . . a truly enchanting series!”

  —Joyfully Reviewed

  “Starts out hot right out of the box, and then keeps getting hotter. Lauren Dane has a knack for making readers feel the passion and excitement of a new relationship . . . it’s easy to see why Lauren Dane is such a well-loved author.”

  —TwoLips Reviews

  “Lauren Dane has once again created characters that you can’t resist . . . the sexual chemistry sparks and sizzles.”

  —Sensual

  “From its completely romantic beginning to its oh-so-sensual end, I loved every word . . . Ms. Dane is definitely becoming a master of the romantic pen!”

  —The Romance Studio

  “Rich and sensual . . . entirely delicious.”

  —Romance Divas

  “Sizzling hot and fun to read.”

  —The Pink Posse

  Berkley Heat titles by Lauren Dane

  NEVER ENOUGH

  THREE TO TANGO

  (with Emma Holly, Megan Hart, and Bethany Kane)

  MESMERIZED

  INSIDE OUT

  INSATIABLE

  COMING UNDONE

  LAID BARE

  RELENTLESS

  UNDERCOVER

  THE BERKLEY PUBLISHING GROUP

  Published by the Penguin Group

  Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

  375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014, USA

  Penguin Group (Canada), 90 Eglinton Avenue East, Suite 700, Toronto, Ontario M4P 2Y3, Canada (a division of Pearson Penguin Canada Inc.)

  Penguin Books Ltd., 80 Strand, London WC2R ORL, England

  Penguin Group Ireland, 25 St. Stephen’s Green, Dublin 2, Ireland (a division of Penguin Books Ltd.)

  Penguin Group (Australia), 250 Camberwell Road, Camberwell, Victoria 3124, Australia

  (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty. Ltd.)

  Penguin Books India Pvt. Ltd., 11 Community Centre, Panchsheel Park, New Delhi—110 017, India

  Penguin Group (NZ), 67 Apollo Drive, Rosedale, Auckland 0632, New Zealand

  (a division of Pearson New Zealand Ltd.)

  Penguin Books (South Africa) (Pty.) Ltd., 24 Sturdee Avenue, Rosebank, Johannesburg 2196, South Africa

  Penguin Books Ltd., Registered Offices: 80 Strand, London WC2R ORL, England

  This book is an original publication of The Berkley Publishing Group.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental. The publisher does not have any control over and does not assume any responsibility for author or third-party websites or their content.

  Copyright © 2011 by Lauren Dane.

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Purchase only authorized editions. HEAT and the HEAT design are trademarks of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

  PRINTING HISTORY

  Heat trade paperback edition / Septemb
er 2011

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Dane, Lauren.

  Never enough / Lauren Dane.—Heat Trade paperback ed.

  p. cm.

  ISBN : 978-1-101-54412-9

  1. Single women—Fiction. 2. Rock musicians—Fiction. 3. Man-woman relationships—Fiction. I. Title.

  PS3604.A5N47 2011

  813’.6—dc22 2011004514

  http://us.penguingroup.com

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  To my usual cast of characters:

  Ray, who is always my safe place.

  Laura, who is my friend and a fabulous agent.

  Leis Pederson—thank you for all the work you do to make my books the best they can be.

  My friends, who will order me not to hit send, who whip me into shape and make my world a better place every day. I’d be in so much trouble without the ability to seek your counsel.

  Fatin, who is absolutely someone I’d be lost without.

  Mary, ditto.

  Renee, yes, you too.

  Special thanks to Ryan Bingham, who is Adrian in my head. Your music was something I listened to often when I wrote from Adrian’s POV.

  Thank you. All of you. This is a pretty solitary business, so it’s my friends and family who keep me grounded and refuse to let me wear sweats all the time.

  1

  It felt so fucking good up there.

  Adrian Brown leaned back, letting the music flow through him. His guitar in his hands because that was where it belonged. That essential, vibrant magic that was music rode him. The pleasure of it, the joy at creation and manipulation. The way he sounded against the drums, over and around the bass.

  Music was alchemy.

  Music was sex.

  When it was right, when everything fit together just perfectly, it was better than any feeling he’d ever experienced.

  The throb of it rested low in his gut, and when he sang, he believed what he said. For the first time in three years when he stood up on a stage, he felt everything he did. He feasted on every detail and it showed. Music was a banquet again and he was starving for it.

  Adrian Brown was back and no one was happier to see him than he himself was.

  The acoustics in the club were total shit and he made it sound good. That utter confidence he’d started with had returned and, goddamn, he liked it.

  His family was there to see it, which made it worth more. To the right of the stage his big brother was rocking it along with his wife, also rocking it. His sister was next to him on the small stage. Rocking it they way they had before.

  I got nothing left to give

  Nothing left

  Taken, taken . . .

  He stepped back from the mic and let the applause come, a big grin on his face as he looked toward his sister, who grinned and waggled her eyebrows at him.

  And they dove in again, leading into a song he and Erin had just finished a few days before.

  In that moment, just as his pick was about to stroke the string, he knew he’d done right to make himself take the time away from the business. Because he’d needed to be lost a little while before he could find himself again. He wasn’t found totally, but he was on the way. He had a direction, and that was most of the battle.

  The scent of the orange oil she used on the kitchen table carried through the house, back to Gillian’s office. Miles had gone off to school just ten minutes before and Gillian stood, staring blankly out over the sweep of the front yard, the pale autumn sun warming her skin.

  And it did nothing to the cold dread in her belly.

  She’d been holding the secret her sister had given up right before she’d died. Holding it tight, not wanting to think on it, knowing she had no other choice.

  A little more than thirteen years ago, Gillian had received a call in the middle of the night that her older sister, Tina, had been in labor. She’d rushed to the hospital—in a sadly ironic coincidence, that hospital had been the same one Tina had died in just three days before.

  Gillian had come home with that baby. The one she adopted and built a life and family for and with. Miles.

  Restless, she turned from the window and headed into the family room, to her piano.

  Once her fingertips touched the wood, she calmed. As she sat, she let herself fall into that place where only the music mattered. Something simple today, uplifting.

  Her fingers danced along the keys of a waltz and the knot of fear and rage began to loosen as the music flowed through her.

  By the time she launched into Fantaisie-Impromptu, the line of her spine had lost its rigidity.

  And that’s how Jules found her.

  “I told you it could wait,” Gillian said, turning to find her friend standing in the doorway. “You have a business to run. You can’t just blow that off.”

  “Whatever. You sounded like you were about to lose your shit just an hour ago. Where else would I be right now? Come on. I brought coffee and some chocolate croissant. For you, I brought ham.”

  Thank God for friends. Gillian followed Jules from the room and into the kitchen.

  Jules hugged her tight before they settled in at the breakfast nook nestled in the sunny corner. “First things first. I’m sorry about your sister. I know you two weren’t close and that she was a total cow for most of your life. But she was your sister and I know you loved her.”

  “Thanks. I’m okay about that part. I mean, yes, I did love her, but I’ve known she was on this path for a very long time. I’m surprised it took so long, to be totally honest.”

  She gulped the coffee and managed a few bites of the croissant, more to keep Jules from lecturing her than out of real hunger.

  Jules waited, saying nothing else, knowing Gillian had to process it all and giving her that time.

  “Right before she died, she told me who Miles’s father was.”

  Jules’s eyes widened at that. “Do tell. After nearly fourteen years she finally dumps it on you as she’s dying. Typical.”

  Just because Jules was supportive of Gillian didn’t mean she would hold back when it came to the subject of Tina’s behavior. She was right, of course. Tina had withheld this information for her entire pregnancy and the years since Miles had been born, despite Gillian’s many attempts to get her sister to tell the truth about it.

  “She made me promise to find him and tell him he was Miles’s dad.”

  Jules’s sleepy blue eyes snapped wide open. “What? Get out! Well, I hope you know that’s bullshit. Fuck that so-called promise to her.”

  Gillian sighed. “I thought it over. I’ve been doing nothing but think about it since she told me three days ago. He needs to know, Jules. Miles needs the opportunity to connect with his dad.”

  “Dad my ass. Where was he when Tina gave that baby to you like he was a pair of shoes? Huh? Where was he when you worked round the clock to afford the mortgage on this house? When you busted your ass to pay for braces and bicycles and summer camp? Fuck that. He’s some shithead who fucked a waitress fourteen years ago—without a condom I might add—so his judgment is seriously impaired.”

  “He didn’t know. She swore to me that she never told him. I tried to put myself in this guy’s place, you know? What would my life be without Miles? What if I had a kid like him out there and didn’t know it? It’s not right, Jules. Not right that she never told him, and it would only be me furthering that to not tell him.”

  “Well, damn it, Gillian, now is not the time for morals.”

  Gillian laughed without humor. “Jules, they’re all I’ve got. I’m responsible for raising that boy into a man. What lesson would I be teaching him if I didn’t find his dad as I promised?”

  “What if he takes Miles from you? Have you thought of that? Can you really take that risk?”

  “No. I can’t. I have an appointment with Cal in a few hours. Before I tell the dad, I have to know my adoption is solid.”

  “At least you’re doing that.” Jules shook her head and looked b
ack to Gillian, reaching out and squeezing her hand. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being so judgy. You are doing the right thing, and of course this is about doing what’s right for your son.”

  “I’m scared. It’s . . . He’s a rock star. A big one.”

  “What? Really? Why didn’t she go after him for money, I wonder?”

  “I don’t know. She wasn’t all bad, you know. She had her moments and I do believe she gave Miles up for good reasons instead of selfish ones.”

  “Yes, and then had nothing to do with him since.”

  True, and yet, in the end, it had been a good thing. “That was for the best too. Miles is my son. Mine. She knew it. Even our mother knew it. Tina loved Miles in her own way. Loved me too.”

  Jules sighed. “So who is it? How’d she meet him?”

  “She met him when she was waitressing in some diner on Sunset Boulevard, she said. She wouldn’t say much more, but that she thought he was an okay guy and that he deserved to know about his son.”

  Jules slammed her palm against the table with a squeal. “Adrian Brown. I knew it! It’s him, isn’t it?” Jules demanded as Gillian gaped at her friend.

  “How did you know that? Did you know and never tell me?”

  “Are you shitting me? You said rock star and immediately I thought of Miles’s face. And hello, have you seen Adrian Brown?”